Hospital
1.7.23
Tangles in her curls
No one cares,
Spending hours
there
Combing her hair.
She smiles,
Listens to songs,
Does not know
her own survival
And why she belongs.
I'm calling the shots
like blanks in a gun
trigger her breaths.
Will she come home?
No one has won.
Out of the windows
this world can't see
a world of survival,
the corners of death
between hallways and me.
My sister is peace
She's always known
Her reality limit,
My constant teacher
I'm saddened, I've grown.
Not leaving her yet
Not here or now,
Machines that beep
forever codes,
Needing miracles
somehow.
Finding solace and self care in some away time, I come back to to take care of my sister in the hospital.
I was told that I have to take care of myself, because who will take care of Halina if I'm not there...
I have grown up with her, we are sisters. She was born with special needs.
Halina knows nothing but love and remembers all the good in her life, she is my constant teacher, putting me in a place of looking at things differently, putting me in a place of love, and discarding layers of armor, future plans, buckets lists and solutions with a present moment of life's breath and a smile.
I'm not missing her yet, Im bringing her home, I don't want her or I to be alone.
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